I made you guys something. It’s inspired by the movie Hocus Pocus. You know, the one that I added to my Halloween giveaway?
See, there’s this scene in the film where the Sanderson Sisters, witches all, are making a potion to steal the youth of a young girl. Winnifred (played by Bette Midler) calls for a dead man’s toe, and Sarah (played by Sarah Jessica Parker) does this:
She goes on to sing all about the dead man’s toe, and I don’t know why, but it just completely cracks me up every, single time. Especially now. Now that SJP is all world famous, and glam, and totally classy. It’s always hilarious to watch this and see her act so goofy.
You know what, though?
You guys have no idea how disgusting the research for these cupcakes was. All I wanted to know was what the bones of a big toe look like. Like, for really real what they look like.
Unfortunately, all of my searches yielded several dozen photos of people broadcasting their maimed and bloodied real life toes.
It was revolting.
It was vile.
But it had to be done. The blog must go on.
The result, of course, is that I have a very revolting and vile looking treat for you that actually tastes fantabulicious.
That is, if you can bring yourself to bite into a swollen, gray fleshed toe kabob. But I assure you that, if you do, you will indeed find it delicious.
These are a truly excellent Halloween party treat to add to your dessert table. They’re easy, they’re fast, they’re yummy, and they’re creeptastic. Sounds like a winning combination to me.
Before I get into the gory details of how to make these, though, I bet you guys wanna know who won the Halloween swag giveaway, huh?
Alright then. Without further ado…
The winner is…
CONGRATULATIONS, Frances Rose!! I also adored Smarties as a child (and now). My grandmother always had a million of them stashed in her purse, all year long. And I’m also a huge fan of Shaun of the Dead! Hilarious!! I’m so happy that you’ve found me, and I hope you keep enjoying what I do, and keep coming back. Thank you for your wonderful words! I will contact you soon for shipping information.
Now then, I can’t gift everyone with lots of awesome Halloween goodies, but are you guys up for the how-to for those fresh, potion-worthy chocolate appendages?
After much deliberation on how to achieve this, I decided to use this awesome bone mold, from Wilton, that I found at Michaels for, like, two bucks.
Even though I thought I did.
And I was too lazy to go buy any (I just finished out a week of caring for my three young nephews…I’m le tired). You know what, though? The sticks worked great; they just weren’t as yummy as the salty, crunchy pretzels would have been.
Next up, mold some cake bite mixture around the bones, but stop at the second knuckle. The best part about these is that some of that bone sticks out of the bottom of the toe. I love how they look like the bone is protruding from a sort of torn off toe.
…but I think you know what I mean.
While making these, you’ll need to rinse your hands off occasionally to get rid of some of the stickiness. The cake doesn’t stick well to the bone, so if your hands are all coated in cake mix, then it will want to stick to you, rather than the bones. Also, you have to really press it around the chocolate to get it to hold.
Be sure to make the cake rounded on top and try to make it a little narrower between the first and second knuckle. I also used my thumb to make an indentation where the toenail would go.
Chill these in the freezer for an hour or so before proceeding. The cake stays stuck during the candy dipping process if these are well chilled.
Once the toes are thoroughly chilled, dip them in melted candy melts or chocolates to coat them completely. I chose to mix a small amount of black candy melts with white chocolate to achieve a lovely decomposing flesh gray. I like the effect, considering, but you could also do something more brown or green instead.
Tap off excess coating by holding the toe firmly over your cup or bowl and tapping your wrist with your other hand. You’ll be surprised ay how much excess chocolate comes off of these.
After dipping, immediately press one of the prepared toenails into the candy coating. Since the toes are cold from the freezer, the coating sets relatively quickly, so don’t waste time attaching the toenails. To make these look a little more realistic, press the base of the toenail down and into the candy coating to sink it in a little more, as though it’s actually grown out of the skin.
I intentionally left the bottoms of these sort of ragged and messy. I didn’t completely coat all of the cake at the base; I only let the candy coating touch to bone in a couple of places, in order to secure the cake to the bone. I think the cake sticking out and the rough edge give a good inpression of a toe that has been pulled, or has maybe rotted, off.
Have I completely repulsed you yet?
Well, then, let’s continue.
Push the sticks into styrofoam to allow the candy to dry. If you use pretzel rods, a deep bowl full of dry, uncooked rice works well for holding these, but be sure that it’s quite deep; these are pretty top heavy, so they’ll need to be secure on the bottom.
I chose to make simple yellow cupcakes for these. I topped them with a combination of vanilla frosting, tinted green, and chocolate frosting that I marbled into the vanilla. I put the frosting into a decorating bag, snipped off the end, and simply swirled it randomly all over the top of the cupcake, covering the cake entirely. I love the wormy, brainy, rotting ick effect. Finally, I finished these off with some bug sprinkles.
Or maybe they’re just bloated corpse toes, and that’s why they’re so big. They’re bloated.
I’m pretty sure that’s what it is.
Dead Man’s Toes
candy melts in colors of your choice
Follow instructions found here for preparing cake bite mixture.